July 27th, 2023... Weary, so very tired, and to be honest… holding on to Hope, by the very tips of my fingers. I asked my now 30-year-old son...“George, Are you angry at God?" As he struggled to step closer to me, each step full of so much pain, George placed his large hands on my shoulders, looked down at me, with such conviction and said “no way! Mom God didn’t do this; God is getting me through this. If it wasn’t for God, Mom we wouldn’t be back together. God used my cancer to bring us back together.”
Later that night was the last time George was able to walk and leave his bed. He was still smiling and had Hope.
George was very excited to meet you all last year and share his story. A story of Hope, Redemption & Restoration. August 8th, 2023, just about 6 weeks prior to the walk, George went home to Jesus.
Hope is what George had, and it's what we all need when facing your own battles.
Restoration has different looks: physically, mentally, relationally, emotionally.
Facing a diagnosis that was given a 3-month mortality rate in November 2018, George chose right then and there, as the great Han Solo said, " Do not tell me the odds, I will show you the odds!"
Resilient, tenacious, battle warrior are words that describe George through this journey.
But his battle wasn't only with cancer, it was within his own thoughts, beliefs, relationships. As it happens, cancer doesn't wait to hit a person when they have "the best medical coverage in place " or "have the "unlimited sick pay stockpiled at work " or "the most loving active support system surrounding them.”
George, at 25 years old, was diagnosed with Sarcoma in November 2018. It had already metastasized. Residing in Southern Oregon at the time, George was quickly connected with Dr. Lara Davis and her amazing team at OHSU in Portland. It took some time to determine what type of Sarcoma George had, and they landed on a rare form of Retroperitoneum Sarcoma, RPS. It didn't make sense, does cancer ever? Less than 49 cases that have the most matching factors as his, all in older men in their 50's plus. Not 25, not just getting their life started.
Over the next few months George had major surgery at OHSU through Dr. Billingsley’s skilled hands, removing a tumor the size of a volleyball that had collapsed his lung and multiple tumors behind it. Then started a chemotherapy treatment cocktail created by Dr. Davis.
Stubborn & Hopeful, George passed the odds that had been laid out to him just months before. This stubborn, hopeful, resilient attitude was what carried George through 3 more major surgeries at OHSU done by Dr. Pommier, I can’t speak highly enough about this man who has so much compassion and love for his patients. The most horrendous chemo regimens that would many times land him in the hospital for weeks. Too many trips between Southern Oregon and Portland to count. A flight to MD Anderson in Houston Texas, to meet with the best of the best regarding this Sarcoma and was so very pleased to hear that George was in great hands with the care in the PNW and keep on track with them. Through all of it George kept fighting. I am so very thankful for that fight in him.
See George had a restoration happening with many people he was estranged from, and I, his mother, didn’t enter this story of the battle till a few chapters in. May of 2021 to be exact.
My faith has never been tested more than the 900 days of my role of praying and supporting from afar. I knew beyond a doubt everything that was lost, would be restored. It had to be when Geoge was ready for our restoration, and oh that stubborn boy took his time.
May 26, 2021, reconciliation happened and after 5 years apart including 900 days of cancer battlefield, I hit the ground at his side for surgery number 3 including at 10 hospital stay.
Walking along side George, watching the blessing of his Hope blossoming, witnessing him heal broken relationships, filling him with a resilience that shined so bright even doctors didn’t have words for what was going on in my son.
Many have heard me say, I am thankful for the blessings that were brought out of this horrible disease. As I shared earlier, I asked George if he was angry at God? He fully believed God was using his cancer to restore his life. Restoration - I was beyond blessed to witness such beauty as a very dehydrated of love human become full again and able to selflessly pour it back out to so many, even as he was literally battling for his life. George forgave himself for past mistakes and was able to forgive others. Nurses that at one time I was baking muffins and cookies for in the dozens, in a feeble attempt to soften the harshness of a very unhappy patient that George was honestly known for, were now hanging out in his room, talking about movies, video games, politics.
Chemo was no longer an option come Fall of 2022. I relocated to Southern Oregon to work remotely and be able to care for George’s increasing needs. In April 2023 George had another large surgery, this would be surgery #4, and later that month we were told it was a total miracle and at that time there was no cancer detectable in his body. Doctors called it a miracle and told George no care plan in place go live your life to the fullest.
Such an amazing blessing, George had a renewed zeal for life. He chose to move to Boise with me and was so excited to…live life to the fullest with grand plans of fishing, camping, looking at driving again, and maybe working some, so many plans, such happiness.
May 17th was the day we learned of the tumor. Shocked, dismayed, heartbroken, confusion, how can this be? Scans misread; information not communicated correctly. We could have chosen to look at it that way, but not George.
We took in the shock, set our heartbreak and anger at the foot of the cross and per George’s instructions “we don’t look back, this is the here and now and we find a team of doctors and we deal with the here and now.” We were thrusted into overdrive hyper speed and God covered and blessed us with throwing a team of doctors together on the fly.
I have been asked many times if we had known of the tumor, would we have moved to Idaho. I honestly don’t know what we would have done. What I do know is George was meant to be in Idaho and he loved it here.
The Grace, Love and Hope George walked with over the last 3 months of his time here on earth was the most beautiful miracle I was honored to witness. George built a community here! Much from a hospital bed. He encouraged new nurses to step in more boldly to what their calling was. He celebrated with friends as they got married and was so encouraging for their future ahead for them. He celebrated a friend stepping out into the unknown and purchasing their first home and doing the hard scary work ahead. He empowered a friend to try a past fail and give it another try with a new vision. Yes, golf can be learned at any age. Even when coached and taught from a hospital bed. I watched as George loved his nephew & sister from afar and poured as much as possible into them.
He loved well from his bed without resentment, without discouragement, without bitterness. George kept his quick wit till the very end. Our banter and connection was like no other and I deeply miss him. I hear his zingers as I experience things, what he would say in a situation, and it brings a smile with a little sting right now. I know with time it will not sting as much and will be a smile with much warmth.
As you can hear, community was very important to George. Throughout this battle George and I both learned how vital community is. Loneliness in our world is at an all-time high, the enemy’s number one foothold to isolate to kill, crush and destroy. George was saved from this. George had full restoration of relationships and life with vibrant community.
As a caregiver/parent with a full-time career there is no way I could have done the 2 and ½ years of loving my son well, if it wasn’t for allowing people in to help me. I was blessed to have a job that allowed me to work remotely when needed, and wonderful friends that stepped in and covered where I was just not able to in so many areas. Please remember, as a caregiver/support person, you are only as good as you allow yourself to be. In other words, we are not Superhero’s, as much as we tell ourselves we need to be, or desire to be. Let people in, let people support you, so you can support your loved one the best.
We just passed the 1 year heavenlyversarry for George. I miss him every day, but I know Geoge would be so happy I am here today sharing his redemption story with you.
George would want you to know:
· There is never enough Star Wars or Marvel
· Be proud to be an American
· Chevy over Ford, yep non-negotiable
· If you have an opportunity to go fishing, hunting or camping do it!
· And love well.
I pray that if you are in the thick of the battle this will bring you hope, if you are weary this will bring you inspiration. I keep up the fight for all those who are still in it, in honor of my warrior Gladiator George.
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